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Why Does It Hurt So Much........










When The Love Addict experiences Withdrawal Symptoms...............





A few weeks ago I discussed relationships in my group therapy session. A lot of my clients shared how they struggled with toxic relationships in their active addiction and how they were unable to stop despite the consequences. That is the thing about process addictions such as love addiction. Despite the consequences, despite the emotional and physical pain, the inability to stop seems impossible. No matter how hard she tries to distant herself by blocking his phone number or deleting him off social media, she somehow finds herself reaching out to him, her point of contact, which is what we call this in recovery. Just like the individual who experiences withdrawal symptoms when they stop using a chemical, is the same thing that the individual who struggles with love addiction experiences. People who have an addiction to love or women who love too much experience similar withdrawal symptoms when they are no longer engaging in the toxic relationship or no longer getting “ a fix”. This is all too familiar to me. I remember in the past, when I would be involved in these toxic relationships, I literally felt like I could no longer breathe, like a part of me was removed. I was in so much pain and could not understand why? why couldn't this pain stop? I became so desperate to the point where I would do any and everything to make it go away. Despite the fact that these relationships were causing more harm than good, it was hard for me to let that individual go completely. I would experience anxiety, my mind would start racing, I couldn't concentrate I literally felt that I was experiencing a panic attack and that I was literally dying. Yes I was dying, but it was not a physical death, it was more of an internal death. It was so hard for me to move on and when triggers arose that reminded me of my point of contact, it made recovery even more impossible. Sometimes the withdrawal symptoms are so severe that having that point of contact, that “fix” is the only thing that will remove our pain. You may be asking yourself, what symptoms am I referring too? This is not comprehensive, symptoms varies from individual to individual, however here are some that I will share with you:

Anxiety
Inability to concentrate
Panic Attacks
Physical pain
Depression
Loss of appetite
Restlessness
Difficulty Sleeping
Irritability
Loss of Interest in Pleasurable activities
In essence, love addicts do experience withdrawal symptoms, the same way that an individual with a chemical addiction experiences withdrawal symptoms when they suddenly stop using their substance.  And as with chemicals, the lessen over time. What symptoms have you experienced due to your addiction? 

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